March Is Rough . . .
Not just for me, but for our entire family. We all just seem to be more irritable, less patient with one another, and need our own space, I think you get the idea.
Honestly for me, the feelings of “that day” March 13, the day our daughter Sara died, starts looming and casting its heavy shadow in early Feb. Not that it’s ever truly gone, it’s always there, under the surface of our smiles and busy lives. Those feelings of “how can this be?” are still there 14 years later, and I suppose they always will be.
Coupled with the sadness there’s an awkwardness of how to acknowledge or mark the day. In the past, we’ve sometimes come together as a family and sometimes not. Sometimes my husband Kim and I need the day to be alone together and other times not. Some years we chose to not get out of bed and other years we’ve gone to work on this day. This day has become an anomaly for us, in that it is never the same each year.
What does one even call “this” day…an anniversary of sorts? Anniversary denotes a celebration, so that’s not the word I choose to use. I have yet to come across a word in the English language that truly expresses what this day should be called.
Over the passing years my meditation practice has helped me to recognize that March 13, 2008, is just one day in our existence and the sadness of this one day will never define or cancel out the 24 years of wonderfulness that we had with Sara prior to March 13. I’ve become resolute in making sure the sadness of that day does not outweigh all the joy and happiness that Sara brought into our lives.
Some may be surprised to learn that my focus on this day is not about “letting go”. In fact, I really dislike that phrase, because I don’t want or need to let go of anything concerning “this” day, so why put my energy on ridding myself of something that I know will always be there.
Instead, I prefer to direct my thoughts and focus towards all that I wish to draw in from this day. Of course, I will be sad and that is ok, but I won’t allow myself to be sad all day, because the sadness really becomes about us and not her. So, I purposely choose to direct my energy into full appreciation of all that Sara was to our family.
I want to remember absolutely everything about our Sara. I want to remember that she loved her family so very much, she enjoyed travel, along with good music and good food and that she was most at home outdoors and with animals. I really could go on and on about her and what made her so special to us all.
I’ll look for signs from Sara that show me that our love is real and that she continues to exist in other forms of energy separate from her body. I know if I listen closely, I will hear her laugh when her sister laughs, and her voice when her brother makes a quip, and I will see her sweet smile in my grandsons’ smile.
So, it doesn’t matter what we call “this day” or how we spend it, but what does matter to me Sara’s mom, is that she is never forgotten and is remembered with love.
I wish you all the same peace that I wish for myself.
Namaste’
Owner of The Mindful Spirit - Restorative Energy Healing, Loralee is a retired Registered Social Worker, Certified Hypnotherapist, Reiki Master/Teacher, Meditation Instructor, and Author of A New Normal - A Grieving Mother's Journey From Loss to Healing available for purchase through:
Amazon.com | Amazon.ca | Barnes&Noble | Balboa Press | Indigo.ca
Available for purchase in-house at:
About Loralee J Scobie
For over 2 decades, Loralee Scobie has been professionally working with energy and helping women (and men) embrace the power of their own being. Loralee started her career as a registered social worker but always knew through her own childhood experiences with spirit that we are all more powerful than we know.
As a Reiki Master/teacher Loralee offers training in Reiki (Japanese healing art) and in meditation. Loralee is a firm believer to be an authentic teacher of Reiki one must work with Reiki daily (either on self or others), for the Reiki energy is the true teacher. In her full-time practice Scobie offers in person and distance (via facetime or zoom) treatments on demand.
Loralee believes that meditation is the foundation to all spiritual practices and should be incorporated into ones’ daily routine. She offers group training online and in person, where she teaches not only how to meditate, but how to create your own meditation practice. Loralee also provides a unique service where she will compose/record a personal meditation just for you, relevant to what you are working on healing in your life.
As a certified hypnotherapist Loralee has helped many clients young and older on how to use hypnotherapy to overcome obstacles in this lifetime. These sessions can be shared either in person or on zoom/facetime.
Loralee is the published author of her first book titled A New Normal-A Grieving Mother’s Journey from Loss to Healing. In this narrative Scobie shares what it took to move her through her grief and to go on to live a life of purpose, following the death of her daughter. She also shares what is and isn’t helpful for grieving parents and how others can best support the bereaved. Loralee can be booked as a guest speaker and welcomes the opportunity to read from her book and sign copies.
Learn more @ loraleescobie.com
Online meditation classes start April 4
Join Loralee Scobie live online through zoom in her new 4 part series: Introduction to Meditation: Learn to Cultivate your Meditation Practice.
Time: Monday Evenings from 7:30pm - 8:30pm MST
Dates: April 4 - 25, 2022
Cost: $100 (all 4 sessions)
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This 4-week online course is designed by Loralee Scobie and offers participants an opportunity to learn not only how to meditate but more importantly how to sustain their meditation practice.
Loralee recognizes that many people already know “how” to meditate, but don’t know how to develop a daily practice of meditation. Together we’ll explore the spiritual and mental blocks that have prevented participants in the past from fully benefiting from a daily meditation practice.
Loralee draws from both years of studying eastern philosophies and from her own 25 years of practicing and teaching meditation.
